Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
