Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
should my penis look like a turkey
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?