Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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