that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize