I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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