butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'm lost and stupid without you.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
