my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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