I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
