if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
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