im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
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