You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
