I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Lo siento on account of my penis...
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
