You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
