And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Randomize