idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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