pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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