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  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 6:11am

    There's actually a name for that. It's called sexual assault.

    • 58 91
      Submitted by Herschel on Feb 15, 10 at 12:44pm

      What if he was also too drunk to consent? Does that make her a rapist too?

      • 68 85
        Submitted by artnerd on Feb 15, 10 at 10:12pm

        If he's sending this kinda text, he wasn't too drunk to consent. Fuckers a dick, and has no grasp of decency.

        • 65 89
          Submitted by Herschel on Feb 16, 10 at 12:06am

          Why do you say that? He seems like exactly the sort of fellow to get loaded and have a one-night stand. He might have been less drunk, but that's hardly sober. Besides, for all we know, maybe the shock was of the "Holy crap, that wasn't a dream" variety. Hard to prosecute based on one text message, you know?

  • 81 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 2:02pm

    In Soviet Russia, we poke your dick to wake you up.

  • 90 97
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 9:34am

    Priceless--you deserve that pussy. Fuck her again

  • 72 63
    Submitted by ggaarrrreett on Jun 17, 10 at 9:01pm

    for everything else, there's mastercard...

  • 69 58
    Submitted by otownassassin on Aug 23, 10 at 3:05am

    I highly doubt an accomplished rapist would stick around for introductions. Maybe he just wanted to know her name.

  • 75 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 4:12pm

    In soviet Russia they must do a lot of dumb shit!!!!!!!!

  • 74 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 16, 10 at 12:59am

    In soviet Russia, she wakes you up by poking you with her dick.

  • 76 76
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 1:40pm

    Hahhhah. Lovely(:

  • 79 88
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 7:44am

    Drunk hookup with introductions after...I think alot of us have been there!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 3:55am

    First... and that sounds priceless. Hahaha

  • 69 84
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 16, 10 at 12:24am

    Sactown!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 3:20pm

    He was too drunk to consent the next morning? If he remembers anything, he wasn't too drunk to consent.

  • 63 84
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 4:50am

    She poked you with her dick to wake you up yo? That's some wild shit B! Did you touch Alexs' dick B? You B, you crazy Son!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 4:09am

    My dick is named Alex. He has a goatee

  • 67 98
    Submitted by pwndbyJIMbone on Feb 15, 10 at 5:27am

    why does this site post one text at a time?

    • Submitted by Herschel on Feb 15, 10 at 12:45pm

      So you have to keep coming back. More ad hits that way. Also, a steady supply of comedy gold(and silver, and bronze) through the day is nice.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 7:02am

    God damn 6:11 you're a fucking retard..would you call sexual assult if you woke up like that? Probably if you're a ugly ass bitch..get a sense of humor and then come on this site..

    • 61 93
      Submitted by artnerd on Feb 15, 10 at 10:14pm

      Not everyone who knows the legal definition of sexual assault is ugly, or female for that matter.

  • 65 96
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 10:19pm

    In capitalist America. Russia get waken up with a dick to her face saying welcome to the world. We got the bright lights And the Re-Revenga Let's go let's go And where into the night...

  • Submitted by trouble09 on Feb 22, 10 at 2:25am

    Thanks Sacramento. Just made me think of all the guys I know named Alex that would do that. I am officially weirded out by my hometown.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 3:57am

    So you charged it on your MC?

  • 52 95
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 7:55am

    6:11 gets gangbanged by her dad and his friends

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 6:21am

    6:11 shut the fuck up you're an ugly woman and ugly bitches call sexual assault on everything cas they can't get any. Obviously the chick was already in his bed naked, not like he snuck in and did it to your mom.

    • 61 97
      Submitted by artnerd on Feb 15, 10 at 10:16pm

      Obviously in his bed is actually not obvious. It could actually be assault. But you are obviously an ass.