i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
