What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize