so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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