What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
