i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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