i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
