you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Randomize
