just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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