Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
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