So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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