i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Mom said you looked used
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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