I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I just googled if crying burns calories
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
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