Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
