So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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