Have some text gold?

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  • I wish I could donate my sober wet pussy to my whiskey wet pussy.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 2:13pm
  • i've never had this problem and i am an established irish drinking mother fucker, whisky makes sex better...especially when she isn't much to look at haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 1:27pm
  • @2:06 ah god i feel dumber from trying to decipher that. i dont think your dick is doing you any favors

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 23, 09 at 10:48am
  • Whiskey Dick is your last line of defense from Beer Goggles

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 3:07pm
  • Amen to that! But when that drunk every dude knows 1/2 the time you don't wear a bag. So limp dick could also be a blessing.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 3:39pm
  • Guys SHOULD NOT attempt to have sex when drunk! See you get us all horney and then you can't even get it up! My vag is soooo frustrated :P

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 1:19pm
  • 2:20, it matters not if the post is fake (and it's probably not), all of us (except the irish guy above- who obviously hasn't drank enough) know how true it is.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 2:23pm
  • You have no idea how much I know what you mean. Really, it's tragic. The opportunities lost to the Demon of el Flacedor.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 25, 09 at 12:08am
  • If u could hold ur aklcohol u fucking pussy u wouldn't have whiskey dick loser

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 7:21pm
  • How bout you just stop drinking so your dick works?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 7:07pm
  • That was awesome! Attempts to have sex even when really wanted while extremely intoxicated aren't always successful, sometimes the dick just doesn't want it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 7:57pm
  • 6:52 is just jealous cause he only got to lick his uncles

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 24, 09 at 12:21am
  • you can donate both to me 2:13

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 2:15pm
  • whoa whoa whoa! thats just NICCE

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 1:07pm
  • My ex and I had incredible sex the drinker he got.. It lasted way longer. It sucked when he was sober.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 23, 09 at 2:47am
  • Or you could always try and find someone who wants to have sober sex with you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 7:30pm
  • whiskey dick is what happens when the girls are too fucking ugly to take home as-is. We have to drink up to control our vomit instinct. Sometimes we go too far and can't get willie up

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 1:35pm
  • 2:15, I'd love to. I'm 2:13

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 2:21pm
  • Why did 1:06 says what's up? If they're mad why would they say what's up? Don't get it... must be some Ebonics thing.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 23, 09 at 5:54pm
  • That is friggin awesome l

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 23, 09 at 2:15pm
  • i FUCKING HATE whiskey dick!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 24, 09 at 11:22am
  • thank god. i'm quite sick of whiskey dick, plus then i have to do all the work.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 1:21pm
  • 5:54 Shut da fak up dumb shet

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 24, 09 at 3:18pm
  • dude very true cause sober boners suck when they are not used

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 1:41pm
  • 11 48: SHUT THE FUCK UP

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 23, 09 at 11:58am
  • Well your dad "prolly" fucks you in the ass

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 9:21pm
  • haha i guess we just shouldn't get too drunk together. that would solve all of our problems (2:15)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 2:27pm
  • I don't think it's fake. I've sent a text almost exactly like that before lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 3:31pm
  • Someones butt hurt quick get the wambulance

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 11:43pm
  • 3:32 no, you prolly just think it does as you dry hump your bf with your limp dick

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 5:58pm
  • bawhahahaaaaa that is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! well said! hheeeheee

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 1:06pm
  • You and every other man.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 9, 10 at 3:30am
  • i think this whenever my supposed drunken hookup turns into naked drunken deadweight in my bed.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 1:11pm
  • Hey10:48 i willl kick ur fakin ass u little pussy bitch wats up dumbshit bet u never got pussy cept for ur own BITCH!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 23, 09 at 1:06pm
  • Man da dick dnt want it wen ur all gone or drunk cuz most of da time ur about to do a ugly fat chick haha ur dicks doin u a favor hahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 23, 09 at 2:06am
  • ...and every other girl.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 25, 10 at 1:46am
  • Agh this is so true

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 1:30pm
  • Just go to your Doc and convince them you need Viagra, you'll never have this issue again

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 2:56pm