either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?