Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
only you would photoshop your dick
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine