so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Randomize
