I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
