You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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