i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
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No one is worth the sensation of burning and stinging crotch.
Lol I've used body wash before....wow did I really just say that...I'm fucking pathetic
Conditioner is better
It truly amazes me how little people know about anatomy.
9:45 you've never actually measured your boyfriend's penis with a ruler because he won't let you. You are just guessing based off of how much porn you watch and you are guessing wrong.
I have an 8 inch coxk, and I wanna put it in a hott
Please never reproduce u loser skank whore.
my dick is 65 inches long
...thanks a lot, asshole. Now I'll never be able to use Pantene Pro-V again without thinking of some douche like you jacking off with it. Stick to the Vaseline next time, please?
1117 is obviously a dumbass niggra...they should all be sterile. Maybe just a flash a radiation at birth? Well just the ones born on welfare...
No 8:55, that's the length of the region with enough nerves to feel the length of it. Girth? Definitely. Length? Not so much.
Makes my pubes shiny and manageable!!!
conditioner is better. i leave the hair silky and smoooooth.
Use your mom's facial scrub lotion next time for much success.
You used it not so much because it is "better" so much as it was due to you being lonely and ugly,
Ur dick is going to turn purple and fall off.
Have fun with your infection.
Seriously, not EVERYTHING is a healthy replacement for lube.
Stay classy Massachusetts
hahaha 10:26 thats fucking glorious
keep it in your pants 11:14.
lololol 9:56 - your right
9:45 don't flatter youself, shut your mouth and get back to being the fat ugly virgin loner you are :)
I did it once and it stung for three days then my skin started peeling off and I had to pull skin off my 8 inch dick and part of my ball sack. One of the most painful experiences ever.
wow 11;30 has clearly never developed a sense of humor....oviously the kid that said 65 inches was joking. no need to take everything literally, jackass
@ 8:51: Is that what your gf told you to make you feel better about your four incher?
Well known fact: Those who state a dick size are tellin nothing but lies ;)
i wouldn't have a problem with this site if the whole user submitting process wasnt a big lie
To all you dumbasses who are bragging about ur dick size, or ur boyfriends dick size, suck on this: a woman can only feel 4 inches of it, and any more than 8 inches will do serious internal damage.
im gonna jerk off.. any hot guys wanna suck me? ohioo guy a t y a h o o d o t c o m
Your pussy is hard? Uh. No.
Why would a girl get yeast infection of shampoo?
Haha 8:51 is so full of shit "a woman can only feel 4 inches" that's the biggest load of crap. My first was 5.5 in. Sex was boring
What is lube used for??
One of my friends once used lipgloss as lube
Seven inch dick??? My bf has a foot long...
Love that:) we need more tv add references lol
11 40 soap doesn't kill bacteria unless its anti-bacterial...so shampoo wouldnt do anything
i used body wash the other day in the shower, the only problem was the water washed all of it away and there was too much friction, that was not good.
and 12 11 ive used shampoo plenty of times, youd have to be an idiot not to wash it off when your done. then your dick wouldn't peel
Lol, conditioner sounds safer
I've used Shampoo before, not smart. I causes cracking on the skin. Not sure if it's actually skin or if the shampoo that leaves some kind of film that is IMPOSSIBLE to wash off. But I'll just say it's very painful to peal off. I was even dumb enough to try it with different brands. Same result. But on my behalf, it's tough to find something to pass as lube in your parent's house when you're 15.
You mean -6.5? 65 would most likely be taller then you my failure friend. Little kid.
Has to be a girl... Very guy learns at 12/13 that shampoo makes your dick peel and I fuckin hurts for a couple days... There's an old SNL skit about a "scaling cream" hahahaha it had Steve Martin in it I think
1125. Why do people like you have to assume like that. How the fuck do we know what anyone looks like? Your prolly just trying to make yourself okay about being a failure at life and a fat fuck yourself. So don't make yourselfff out to be holyer than thou.
Omg really people. No one has ever had a big dick before? Like an 8 incher. Why is everyone getting all butt hurt over what 945 said? Maybe he/she has a big bf. Whoooo caresssss. And whyyyyy do people have to insult him/her?? Fuck.
i think everyone is missing the point of this website; the whole idea behind it is for people to post the dumb things that they do so that we can get a good laugh. masturbating with shampoo is clearly not the best idea, therefore it is funny. i think everyone needs to relax.
did you use no tear soap so your eyes wouldn't burn?
I would usually never post on here, but "9:56" is actually right about his/her first statement... And most of you all are just serious idiots. And 11:28- I agree. And as someone else posted earlier, i don't give a fuck about you or any of your boyfriends dick sizes.
956 stfu maybe he/she did measure and your just upset because your too ugly to get laid period. So youuu resolve to watching porn. And wishing you even had a bf to guess his dick size.
Nice pun :) very funny
@9:11 You're my hero.
I've used conditioner before it was in the shower and a fun time ;p
Don't let it dry on there cause it'll hurt like a bitch later
Almost funny--nice progress
9:47, that would be Billy Madison.
Okay this can't be a chic because...seriously ow. It could be someone who has never actually gotten soap products in that area and just made up a text. I'm thinking fail.
I'm a girl. I've done that and never got a yeast infection or any type of infection... why are people insisting you will...
9:45pm - Is obviously a fat, sloppy virgin. No guys dick is 9 inches. Get urself a lay
Woa. Why is everyone hating on poor 956? Lol. And WTF cares about your bfs dick size!
criso and garnier conditioner also work well
@ 3;21 - Uhh yeah there are guys that have 9 inch wangs.
Ooo. Eat me out baybe! Suck and lick my hot wet hard pussy!!!!!!
11:30, did everyone use it as a jump rope on the playground?
It's not about the length as much as how he knows how to use it. I wouldn't trade my guy for anything in the world.
U where better off with spit.
Because soap kills all tht good bacteria in the vagina that fight of bad bacteria that give you infections. If soap gets like innnn there. Not just a wash up.
If you're not even able to get wet, maybe you're not that worthed.
@8:51 Is that how you make yourself feel better my bf has between 8.5-9 and I don't have serious internal damage. However your little pea shooter has evidently given you serious psycological damage.
Are you people pretending that this isn't normal? I've done this hundreds of times, why lie about it? I prefer liquid body soap like the guy a few posts before me.
Woooowwww little arument we got goin on here. All I gotta say iz 956 u gotta stop bein such a hard ass and stop actin like u got sum expirience cuz u dnt got shit. How u know her/hiz bf dnt get sum kix measurin hizself?
bottle of lor'eal shampoo - 5$ --- clean pubes afterwards - priceless
my dick is 65 FEET long.
Hahahahaha must use l'oreal!
10:58<3 9:56 your too lame for words. Get laid by and stfu
Doesn't that dyin it
Texas as in Cody from Dallas? Fuck no...I tried shampoo years ago...definately not the most glorious moment in my life.
or at least olive oil! hahahaha
there was this kid in middle school who went to the hospital for jackin off with shampoo. now he's known in high school as "SHAMPOO" lmao!
This Mexican dude used a k-mart bag for a condom on this one chick.
2:49 I fuckinlove you
Ive used it before, it felt good
Conditioner is better. Shampoo can sting.
when I anally masturbate... I just don't wipe first... Lube enough.
NEVER SHAMPOO YOUR DICK/ PUBES. it's easily the most painful experience I have ever had. My dick became blackened and I couldn't get it up for weeks. I thought I accidentally sterilized myself. It was HORRIBLE.
Did someone really refer to their boyfriend as a footlong? I feel like we are talking about a subway sandwich.
"Shampoo is good....but conditiona is betta."
Name that quote.
12:00 lol that's what i was thinking!
stop looking at me swaaaaaan!
11:34 is just desperate for a big black cock.
249,, that was funny ! :)
better than the op!! :)
@321 your fucking stupid. Just because you haven't ever had a big dick in your life and settle for below avarage sloppy seconds doesn't mean that a guy can't have a 8.5 inch dick. Get laid with a big dick for once and leave poor 945 alone gutter slut.
Massachusetts represent!! Goo Massholes... Bahstin<3
Lather, rinse, repeat. Just don't get it in your eyes.
Aha cute :p
and p.s. 11:14 if you're telling the truth... call me ;)
That shit burns if used anally
Shampoo is the best lube
If this text was written by a girl...good luck w/ that impending yeast infection.
12:11 a girl would never be dumb enough to use shampoo as lube. That stuff goes INSIDE us. Can you say yeast infection from hell??
I've used mayonaise as lube before. It was her idea.
I'm jacking off in my bed right now
I got a 7 inch dick :) jealous much?
11:14, i'm impressed .. but wouldn't a dick as long as that cause internal damage, as suggested by 8:51
..but we'll be careful ;)
In soviet russia shampoo uses YOU as lube!!!!!
My dick is 75 inches long. Or in other words, he's 6'3"....but I sure do love him.
Uh owww!! Really I get wet in a half a second and I mean dripping wet. U might wanna get that checked out
Just use conditioner retards you don't peal