i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
