She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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