you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
