that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
he puts the penis in happiness.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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