The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize