fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
My life is pants optional.
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