Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
