i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
