I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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