So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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