what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
