Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
