Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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