Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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