I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize